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Photo: TONL

Black Love: It's Time to Tell it Like it Is

Are 'ride-or-die' relationships simply an excuse for the abuse of black women?

I remember my first proper relationship (or so I thought) in my first year of university. I had a close black male friend whom I had met through a scholarship we had both been awarded. We were almost inseparable and so naturally I assumed that we would make an equally amazing couple. Long story short, he was emotionally inept and at times that ineptitude would turn abusive.

I will never forget the day I reached out to him, just a few months after my father had passed away, and he told me that I ought to stop expecting everyone to feel sorry for me. It had been four months already and I needed to get over it. But I was so determined to love him, young as I was, so determined to prove that like the many strong black women in my family, I too was one of them. The failure of my relationship was not an option.

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Op-Ed
Via Tonl

Asexual Pansexual—On Performing Queerness Without Having Sex

How do we hold onto identity in a world full of expectations about what you do with your private parts.

Asexual pansexual—the title reads like that of a bad poem and in a parallel universe it may very well be but for now, it is the one I carry. One I use so those around me can identify/roughly guess what I do with my genitals and heart (but mainly my genitals). With the title, however, comes the weight of having to live up to what I claim to be. To perform, for lack of a better term, my queerness in order to prove to the world that I am, in fact, what I say I am.

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Writing

A Plea for the Living and Unborn: Reflections On an Abortion

A father-to-be reflects on asking his partner to get an abortion she didn't want and wonders what could have been.

Dear beloved,

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